(Giving Robin the lustful eye. Josh Radnor, Cobie Smulders and Neil Patrick Harris in the season premere of "How I Met Your Mother.")
It’s so good to have my old TV friends back.
“How I Met Your Mother” started it’s fourth season Monday night, with "Do I Know You?" picking up right where it left off with Ted proposing to Stella and Barney realizing he has more than the hots for Robin.
So Stella says yes and Barney recruits Lily to help him win Robin’s affection but of course things don’t exactly work out.
Not only does Ted not know Stella’s favorite movie or color but he doesn’t even know any of her hobbies. What has this couple been doing since they started dating? I mean, I know the obvious question but you gotta get a bite to eat and talk between sessions. Then Marshall, who is still unemployed and whose role consisted of bugging other people during the episode, asked if Stella liked “Star Wars,” Ted’s favorite movie. Predictably, Ted overreacts questions if he could marry a girl without knowing her opinion of Episode 4? No, really. How could he? That’s like finding out the girl you are about to live with for the REST of your life likes ice-cold showers. Creepy. He also didn’t know she was allergic to peanuts, which results with a trip to the ER.
Meanwhile, Barney is still figuring out how to deal with these “feelings” he caught when he bonked Robin last season and gets Lilly to help him in his quest. Lilly compared helping Barney to helping a boy in her kindergarten class about to eat a pair of scissors. She makes Barney promise to stop nailing everything that moves if he is serious about Robin.
During a dinner arranged by Lilly, Barney tries to get Robin to see past the male-chauvinist-pig-egotistically driven side and, you know, see his soft side but we see Robin takes comfort in that chauvinist side of Barney because she too has a little bit of that in her too. She likes hanging out with Barney because he laughs at her overtly lame innuendo-ladened jokes, like “I was at the dentist today and he totally drilled me. All day. He drilled me hard.” But nothing from Barney. No dirty comment or “yeah he did.” Nothing.
It was obvious despite his efforts that Robin was never going to see him more than a bro to tell dirty jokes to. It was even more painfully obvious when she set him up with the busty cute waitress at the restaurant.
Cut to later that night, Barney is lamenting to Lilly about lost love when the same waitress walks out in just a shirt asking under what name should her family pick up tickets to watch Barney as a New York Yankee. Classic Barney, but we all know he is just using this poor girl to hide the bruises from his defeat with Robin. Or at least we hope.
Lilly, understandably frustrated, asked how he can still sleep with every bimbo on the planet while saying he is in love with Robin and makes him choose between the two.
“I choose bimbos,” he declares. “Bimbos make me happy. Bimbos make me feel alive. Bimbos make me want to pretend to be a better man. At the end of the day, my heart belongs to bimbos.”
And with that, Lilly storms out of Barney’s apartment in frustration. We see Barney turn on his wall-size TV to see Robin anchor the news and smiles. At least we all know there is more to him that bimbos.
Oh, yeah. I almost forgot about Ted and Stella.
So Ted arranges a viewing of “Star Wars” with Stella. (I’m confused, I thought she was so busy with her tattoo-removing practice and her daughter that she made Ted go on a 10-minute date with her but now she has all this free time to watch movies and hang out at Ted’s place?) Anyways, Ted, so annoyingly worried Stella might not like his precious favorite movie, annoys Stella so much during the movie she banishes him to his room so she can watch the movie alone.
After the credits roll, she comes and tells him she loves it. But while Ted is in the other room, Marshall get her to confess her true feelings for Yoda and Co.
“How do they understand that walking bear they are always hanging with,” she said.
She hated it, if you couldn’t tell.
But when Marshall asks if she could pretend to like a movie she actually hates for the rest of her life, she says yes. Aww. How sweet. Too bad we don’t care because we all know this courtship isn’t going to last. And because this relationship is the most boring one on the show, even more boring then the almost couple of Barney and Robin. I’m counting down to when this ends even though I’m a huge fan of Sarah Chalke and it pains me to watch her on that has-been great show “Scrubs.” Maybe she can stay on HIMYM as a reoccurring character but she probably won’t.
Season 4 has the bad luck of coming after two plot-pack seasons. I have a feeling it’s going to be a lackluster season. I mean the show really can’t pick up steam until we start getting closer to finding who the Mom is going to be. Until then, we’ll have fun with Robin and Barney and Marshall and Lilly. But for Ted, well, I don’t really want him hogging screen time until he’s with the One.
HIMYM is on CBS Monday nights.
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