Don't blame AIG

As the US public collectively collects its breath from all the huffing and puffing over the news that AIG was giving bonuses to the same executives that dragged the company into the ground, bringing along the US economy with it, it's important to remember who is tresponsible in this mess.

For the most part in this country, companies follow the law. Whether its labor laws, tax laws or "Hey, you shouldn't pay women less than men" laws. They do so because generally its more cost efficient to follow the law rather than try to make a buck or two breaking the law. Sure there are the occasions when companies try to skirt the law, like with the cases when Wal-Mart was forcing employees to work off the clock or industrial companies trying to get around environmental laws. But for the most part, following laws saves companies more money than they would make by breaking them. 

So when a company does something that pisses you off, that you think is unfair and unjust, blame the folks who make the laws. In following the laws, companies will just do the bare minimum to get by - i.e. minimum wage, insurance and privacy rights. So, when AIG decided to pay out these bonuses, the law was on its side. They had the right. I have found that when companies are accused of wrongdoing, there is a law protecting them from their actions. Companies are not going to do anything more than they are legally obligated to, they should but there is no bottomline incentive. 

Laws in this country so heavily company/business/corporate friendly. Companies hire armies of lobbysts and lawyers to ensure that the law is on their side. It's not fair, but do you expect anything less from our elected officials? 

Now, we could try to pinpoint the blame on the White House for not foreseeing said bonuses and denying companies who received bailout money to pay them or Congress, who approved loopholes, giving companies AIG the legal way to allocate these bonuses. 

I have to admit that I too got caught up in the ire over the bonuses but after I cooled off and reminded myself that the $164 million or so represented less than 1/10 of 1 percent of the total bailout money AIG has received. But I'm not so sure all this rage is constructive toward the bigger picture - fixing this economy. I can't even start on how we do that. 

IDing Rihanna

For the most part, journalists are godless pinko commies. But most journalists cherish and honor their code of ethics. I have worked for five newspapers and at one I was the crime reporter. There, it was routine for me to do stories about domestic abuse and sexual violence. In every case, I and the newspaper, protected the identity of the reported victim. Newspapers do this because of the stigma attached to victims of domestic abuse and sexual violence.

I only bring this up because in all of the Chris Brown stories, none of the news outlets have shied away publicly identifying singer Rihanna as the victim in this case. Do anchors and reporters think that because she is a public figure that allows them to get away from the responsibility of naming her as the alleged victim?

One of the pillars of journalistic ethics is minimizing harm. Are journalists doing that in this case? Though it's probably safe to assume Rihanna is the alleged victim here but how did reporters source this? Did the cops release her name in documents? It's always been my experience that victims of abuse are named Jane or Jon Doe until court proceedings. Apparently in this case, in the police complaint, the alleged victim is identified as Robyn F. Rihanna's real name is Robyn Rihanna Fenty. Still, the media has an obligation to the alleged victim to keep her name from news reports. I'm not worried so much about this case since most of the public familiar with the couple probably correctly assumed who the victim was before the name was released but what if news outlets apply the same rules to private couples and "real" people in "real" communities?

Why don't standard journalism ethics apply when it comes to celebrity coverage?

Cheap shoes

Looking at myself in the bathroom mirror

I need a haircut but doesn't matter today

Not even bothering with a shave

Where I'm headed I'm not expecting to pose for any group shots

Sitting at the edge of my makeshift bed

Trying to collect enough momentum to get through today

I put put my plastic Payless shoes over my mix-matched black socks

The cheap shoes will have finished their sole purpose after today and no one is going to be looking at my socks

Will have to use my mind as a shutter today because none of this will be remembered on cellulose

My jacket still carries dust from its last funeral

Meant to get it cleaned by didn't plan on wearing it to another one quite so soon

None of this matter because no one takes pictures at funerals

I used to think I was two inches too short from being content with life

Now after today, I can add I'm short a brother to say the same

FUCK YOU 2008

Typically, I d not believe in laying blame of life's calamities or misfortunes to intangible or abstract things such as fate, luck or time. But as I sit here on New Year's Eve and I look back on the year ending, I am going to make an exception.

FUCK YOU 2008.

2008 is officially, certifiably the worse fucking year. And 2008 came on the heels of 2007, which was the previous record holder of being the worse fucking year.

2008 kicked off with my job being eliminated and me being transferred to Greeley, the fucking stinkin' armpit of Colorado and the western hemisphere. And that was six days in.

After that, it was the death of my kid brother in February. And though that was the fucking cherry on the shit sunday of my year, 2008 didn't seem to want to release its chokehold on my nutsack.

After that, my year continued to fuck me with the other side of the broom with me losing my car then losing my shit job in Greeley. And just when I thought 2008 would try to redeem itself by allowing me to get a decent job in Albuquerque, it came in and snagged that job away from me. The year of the elephant's ass was also the first year I was single the whole year since "Seinfield" was on the air. Golf clap 2008, fucking golf clap.

So even if I get dysentery and lose my foot in a horrible fight with a homeless man over an half eaten cum sandwich, 2009 will be a vast improvement.

So just that I am clear - FUCK YOU 2008 AND I HOPE YOUR MOM BURNS IN HELL!!

Stay safe.

Are you a Woo Girl? HIMYM

"X-files" had two types of episodes; ones that followed the show's mythology and freak-of-the-week episodes. The latter where episodic; open and shut.

That is what this week's "How I Met Your Mother" was. Suspecting that the show's writers want to give some breathing room between Ted's doomed courtship of Stella and his next lady, the show's mission to find the titular character has been put on hold. This week, we learn Robin is a closet Woo Girl and watch Barney do good and give Ted the biggest gig yet of his career.

Lilly is invited to a co-worker's birthday party (remember, she works at an elementary school) and brings Robin, who is still single and unemployed, along. When they arrive, they learn that the birthday girl, Jillian played by Jamie-Lynn Sigler of "The Sopranos," is a Woo Girl after hours. We all know at least one Woo Girl. They are the girls at the bars in tiny cowboy hats that take shots out of glowing shot glasses and call each other bitches and sluts. But their signature is of course wooing when their favorite song comes or when a boy takes their shirt off or for any other reason. For more about Woo Girls, visit Barney's blog.

It's in hanging out with the woo girls that Robin learns she needs to hang out with single girls and stop being a third wheel with Lilly and Marshall. Lilly tries to be a woo girl so she can hang out with Robin but discovers she just isn't one.

Meanwhile, Goliath National Bank, where Barney and Marshall work together, is looking for an architect to build its headquarters. Barney tells Ted he has the job. He only has to beat out a Sven," an uber-modern architecture "collective" from Sweden. After giving his presentation, Ted all but has the job until Sven presents a building shaped like a T. Rex that shoots flames. Unable to resist having an office in the head of a dinosaur, Barney screws over Ted and gives the job to Sven. Was it just me or was Neil Patrick Harris playing the leader of Sven?

During their conference call - a code Barney and Marshall use to get out of work and drink beer on the roof - Marshall finds out what Barney did and leaves him locked outside the building. Of course, Barney realizes the errors of his way and decides to give the job to Ted.

Is HIMYM on the verge of becoming a workplace comedy with the prospect of Ted, Marshall and Barney all working at the same place? Seems to be the direction. I guess the show needs more than two locations that is primary uses - Ted's place and the bar.

I don't mind a couple stand alone episodes as long as viewers are paid off later with more hints of finding the Mom. The best jokes were the conference call prank, of course the Woo Girls (which included a lesbian situation) and a reference to AMC's "Mad Men." While drinking on the roof Marshall said they were mad men themselves. Barney decided that drinking at work made them "basically Mad Men."

"I'm going to go smack a secretary on the ass," Barney said.

"That's so what they would do on that show," Marshall replied.

"What show?" Barney asked.

Best joke - Barney: "I picked it, because it -- it... It breathes fire, Marshall."
Marshall laughing: "Fire Marshall"

New Word: talk blocking

Congrats NPH

So this isn't new news but I wanted to congratulate Neil Patrick Harris a.k.a. Barney as being named one of Entertainment Weekly's Top 25 Entertainers of the Year. The top honor went to Robert Downey Jr. (apparently you have to have three names to make the list).

Though Tina Fey was on the list, I thought she blew everyone away with not only "30 Rock" but her stint as everyone's favorite hockey mom ("Baby Mama" made a decent rental). 2008 was definitely her year. I bet EW's editors had already choosen Downey before Sarah Palin hit the scene.

But back to NPH . . .

In addition to "How I Met Your Mother", EW applauds Harris' return as himself in the "Harold & Kumar" sequal and his role in Joss Whedon's "Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog." I haven't seen the "Harold & Kumar" (the first one wasn't that great) and I haven't catch "Dr. Horrible" yet. Still, solely based on his role as everyone's favorite womanizer (Gossip Girl's Chuck Bass should take note), Harris deserved this title. Oh yeah, and for those hilarious Old Spice ads.



Jason Segel deserves some entertainer props too for also starring and writing "How to Forget Sarah Marshall," one of the funniest movies this year.

Stella!!!!

It was only a matter of time.
We learned last week that Ted's Stella was in fact not the title character. In this week's episode, "Happily Ever After," we watch the fallout of Stella dumping Ted at the alter - can we say cliche??? - with the gang trying to get Ted to act the way they think he should.

Since I haven't blogged this season yet, I'll just say I am glad it was Stella who dropped Ted and not the other way around. It was great to see that Ted really did love Stella and her daughter and did, in fact, want to be with her instead of just marrying her just to fit his goal of getting hitch. It sucks that I'm left hating Stella and will always think of her as "that bitch" because I actually love Sarah Chalke.

Though I always knew she wasn't the Mom (mostly because she has an 8-year-old daughter, I would have liked to see Chalke become a regular on this show just because I'm cringing as I prepare to watch her in the final season of "Scrubs," which has fallen off the deep end. With Chalke only making a brief appearance in this episode, and not even sharing a line with any of the cast, it looks like HIMYM's time with Stella is over.

And I love how Ted is becoming interesting again. Since hooking up with Stella last season, his character had quickly become my least favorite. I was more interested in seeing Marshmallow and Lillypad together and Barney chase after Robin. But now that Stella is in the rearview window, we can get back to finding the Mom.

This episode didn't have a lot of time for jokes. Yeah, all of them hiding under the dinnertable when Stella came in to the same restaurant was amusing and the flashbacks were solid but overall, the epsiode dealt with the fallout. I loved how everyone wanted Ted to act they way they would have: Marshall wanted him to unleash all his anger, while Robin understood why Ted just wanted to avoid Stella at all costs - included avoiding half of Manhattan.

Encouraged by the group, Ted got up the nerve to tell Stella she made the wrong choice, a choice she would regret for the rest of her life, but when he saw her go home to her daughter and Tony, he knew it was the perfect end to her love story but not his. (Collective sigh)

Now, let's find out who is under that yellow umbrella.

Bimbos always beat out true love - HIMYM

(Giving Robin the lustful eye. Josh Radnor, Cobie Smulders and Neil Patrick Harris in the season premere of "How I Met Your Mother.")

It’s so good to have my old TV friends back.

“How I Met Your Mother” started it’s fourth season Monday night, with "Do I Know You?" picking up right where it left off with Ted proposing to Stella and Barney realizing he has more than the hots for Robin.

So Stella says yes and Barney recruits Lily to help him win Robin’s affection but of course things don’t exactly work out.
Not only does Ted not know Stella’s favorite movie or color but he doesn’t even know any of her hobbies. What has this couple been doing since they started dating? I mean, I know the obvious question but you gotta get a bite to eat and talk between sessions. Then Marshall, who is still unemployed and whose role consisted of bugging other people during the episode, asked if Stella liked “Star Wars,” Ted’s favorite movie. Predictably, Ted overreacts questions if he could marry a girl without knowing her opinion of Episode 4? No, really. How could he? That’s like finding out the girl you are about to live with for the REST of your life likes ice-cold showers. Creepy. He also didn’t know she was allergic to peanuts, which results with a trip to the ER.

Meanwhile, Barney is still figuring out how to deal with these “feelings” he caught when he bonked Robin last season and gets Lilly to help him in his quest. Lilly compared helping Barney to helping a boy in her kindergarten class about to eat a pair of scissors. She makes Barney promise to stop nailing everything that moves if he is serious about Robin.

During a dinner arranged by Lilly, Barney tries to get Robin to see past the male-chauvinist-pig-egotistically driven side and, you know, see his soft side but we see Robin takes comfort in that chauvinist side of Barney because she too has a little bit of that in her too. She likes hanging out with Barney because he laughs at her overtly lame innuendo-ladened jokes, like “I was at the dentist today and he totally drilled me. All day. He drilled me hard.” But nothing from Barney. No dirty comment or “yeah he did.” Nothing.

It was obvious despite his efforts that Robin was never going to see him more than a bro to tell dirty jokes to. It was even more painfully obvious when she set him up with the busty cute waitress at the restaurant.

Cut to later that night, Barney is lamenting to Lilly about lost love when the same waitress walks out in just a shirt asking under what name should her family pick up tickets to watch Barney as a New York Yankee. Classic Barney, but we all know he is just using this poor girl to hide the bruises from his defeat with Robin. Or at least we hope.

Lilly, understandably frustrated, asked how he can still sleep with every bimbo on the planet while saying he is in love with Robin and makes him choose between the two.

“I choose bimbos,” he declares. “Bimbos make me happy. Bimbos make me feel alive. Bimbos make me want to pretend to be a better man. At the end of the day, my heart belongs to bimbos.”

And with that, Lilly storms out of Barney’s apartment in frustration. We see Barney turn on his wall-size TV to see Robin anchor the news and smiles. At least we all know there is more to him that bimbos.

Oh, yeah. I almost forgot about Ted and Stella.

So Ted arranges a viewing of “Star Wars” with Stella. (I’m confused, I thought she was so busy with her tattoo-removing practice and her daughter that she made Ted go on a 10-minute date with her but now she has all this free time to watch movies and hang out at Ted’s place?) Anyways, Ted, so annoyingly worried Stella might not like his precious favorite movie, annoys Stella so much during the movie she banishes him to his room so she can watch the movie alone.

After the credits roll, she comes and tells him she loves it. But while Ted is in the other room, Marshall get her to confess her true feelings for Yoda and Co.

“How do they understand that walking bear they are always hanging with,” she said.

She hated it, if you couldn’t tell.

But when Marshall asks if she could pretend to like a movie she actually hates for the rest of her life, she says yes. Aww. How sweet. Too bad we don’t care because we all know this courtship isn’t going to last. And because this relationship is the most boring one on the show, even more boring then the almost couple of Barney and Robin. I’m counting down to when this ends even though I’m a huge fan of Sarah Chalke and it pains me to watch her on that has-been great show “Scrubs.” Maybe she can stay on HIMYM as a reoccurring character but she probably won’t.

Season 4 has the bad luck of coming after two plot-pack seasons. I have a feeling it’s going to be a lackluster season. I mean the show really can’t pick up steam until we start getting closer to finding who the Mom is going to be. Until then, we’ll have fun with Robin and Barney and Marshall and Lilly. But for Ted, well, I don’t really want him hogging screen time until he’s with the One.


HIMYM is on CBS Monday nights.

"Mad TV"

(The cast of AMC's 'Mad Men')

It’s a cigarette lighter. A quick, subtle glance from an admirer or a wanted paramour. These are the kind of devices used to tell the web of personal stories in “Mad Men,” the brilliant AMC show about the world of 1960s advertising executives. The show, now about halfway through its second season, is a complete contrast to the loud world of the “CSIs” and “Law and Orders,” where the M.O. of storytelling is either showing blood and guts, recycling the same old storylines and/or revealing some surprise twist at the end (trust me, the old creepy landlord at the beginning of the episode is always the murderer/rapist/kidnapper).

In “Mad Men,” there are no gimmicks. There’s no whodunit or puzzle to solve. Just as “American Beauty” cut a slice of Americana, “Mad Men” gives a fly-on-the-way glimpse of households, relationships, love, lust and sometimes unexpected comedy.

I started watching the show after AMC ran a marathon of the first season. I kept hearing the title along with words like Emmy, Golden Globes, critically acclaimed. It was August, which is deadman’s land for new TV shows, so I aching for something new besides “The Daily Show” and “The Soup.”

It has quickly become a favorite show of mine, even rivaling its premium channel counterparts like Showtime’s “Dexter” and the stable of HBO greats like “Six Feet Under” and “The Wire.”

The show also is unconventional in that there is no clear protagonist, bad guy, villain or even hero.
Take the show’s central character, Don Draper, who is the creative director at the ad agency Sterling Cooper. Draper, captured perfectly by Jon Hamm. Draper is successful at his job, successful at home, with a picture-perfect wife, played by the gorgeous January Jones, and two little kids. But Draper, like most of the characters on the show, keeps a dark side. When he is not closing account deals or taking building his kids a playhouse, he is sleeping with the wife of one of his clients or sometimes with the female clients themselves. You watch as these real characters makes choices with real consequences. There is no soap opera twist, just sober realities.

As loud as shows like “CSI” and “Cold Case” are with blood and guts, “Mad Men” resonates the same volume but only with its brilliant subtleties and well of characters.

In Memoriam: The Goatee. Early September 2008 - Late September 2008

When we look back on the time of Chris' goatee we will remember a time of fortitude, determination and the character and drive to do something, despite its overwhelming unpopularity.

It withstood spite, mockery and in some clandestine circles - jealous. Sweet, bitter jealous.

Though its time was short, the resonance from its impact will be oh so forever lasting, much like the ripples in a pond from a rock thrown by a fat kid. A fat kid no one liked and had bed wetting problems.

We will go about our lives. Through the times of good and bad. But let us not forget The Goatee. May its soul rest in peace (in my drain).

Highs and lows in 'Pineapple;' 'Tropic' laughs at itself

(Seth Rogan and James Fracno in "Pineapple Express." Sony Pictures)

To make up for my absence from this blog, my gift to you is a two-for-one review. Over the weekend, I saw “Pineapple Express” and “Tropic Thunder.”


“Pineapple Express” – Thursday night, Cinemark, 4721 South Timberline Rd. in Fort Collins.

I’m against the legalization of marijuana. Not because the use of bud is particularly harmful to people or because potheads grossly over consume their share of Cheetos and Slurpees. No. It’s because if pot were legal, it would take the fun away from watching goofball antics of potheads in movies.

I’ll admit, I’m not a big fan of pot . . . movies. The only exception I can think of is the Dave Chappelle joint “Half Bake.” I just don’t get what’s so funny about characters acting like buffoons and saying completely illogical and dismissible lines. It’s like pot smoking gives the filmmakers and actors an excuse for cheap non-sequitur dialogue and storylines not quite all the way thought out. But for “Pineapple,” it was those things that made me laugh my hash off.

The appeal of “Pineapple” is watching the duo of Seth Rogan who plays Dale Denton, a pot smoking, process server, high-school-girl-dating, almost has-been and Spiderman’s James Franco who plays Saul Silver, Denton’s dealer. Personally, I have never met a dealer but if I did I hope and expect for him or her (but probably him) to resemble Saul.

Rogan and Silver were a perfect screw-up duo. The best scenes were of the two, smoking and trying to figure out how to get out of this mess they were in, which leads me to the movie’s hangover.

The plot of this movie was pretty inexcusable, even for a pot movie, because it wasn’t far-fetched enough to be considered a joke and it took up way too much time. Basically, on his way to serve some court papers, Denton witnesses a murder. It turns out the killer, Ted Jones, played by Gary Cole, everyone’s favorite boss from “Office Space,” is also Saul’s supplier. Jones tracks down Denton and Saul through the rare pot Denton was smoking when he witnessed the murder. The name of that pot? Yep, Pineapple Express. The movie also has an oddball appearance by Rosie Perez, who plays Jones’ second.

But while the plot is under baked, the comedic bits between Rogan and Silver were the highs. I have to give a shout out to the fight scene between Roger and Silver vs. Danny R. McBride, who plays Red, Silver’s middleman. The fight between the three was easily the funniest brawl since “Borat.” It was a scene were I was literally crying and my checks hurt from laughing so hard.

But by the final 20 minutes, the flopped plot takes over and I’m just waiting for the credits. Rogan, who wrote the script, attempted to make a pot-slash-action movie, but he should have left the action to the big boys. Still, the jokes in between make the blunt journey worth it. (I think I got enough pot references in).

Grade: C+

(Ben Stiller playing an actor who can't act (not really a stretch) and Robert Downey Jr. playing a black guy in "Tropic Thunder." Dreamwork Pictures.

“Tropic Thunder” – Friday night, Metrolux 12 Theatre, 6085 Sky Pond Dr., in Loveland

Ben Stiller is hit or miss with me.

Hated “Meet the Parents,” loved “Dodgeball.” And well I loved “Something About Mary,” and liked “Zoolander,” or the parts I have seen, I skipped on it most of his fair, like “Along Came Polly,” and “Night at the Museum.”

Though I can’t put “Tropic Thunder” in the love category, I can firmly place in the “hey, that was pretty good” category.

While “Tropic,” which is about film within a film, wasn’t nearly as funny as “Pineapple Express,” it was a better movie. Though I didn’t really laugh out loud, the move definitely had its chuckle moments. Like everyone else, I was entertained by Tom Cruise’s role as a beefy, balding movie executive. But I thought the real surprise was Matthew McConaughey’s performance as the agent for Ben Stiller’s character. McConaughey spends the whole movie making sure his client gets his contract-guaranteed TiVo (a need I can relate to). I didn’t think Jack Black earned his screen time but his name alone will warrant some jokes. Also worthy of praise, was Robert Downey Jr., who played an Australian actor playing a black man (in black face, no less). And sue me, I think curse words are hilarious. My funny bone is still 15 years old.

The best line of the movie: Downey: “I know who I am! I'm the dude playing the dude disguised as another dude!”

The line seemed more appropriate for Downey himself rather than his character. And it’s that take the movie runs with that makes it fun to watch. The real filmmakers, Stiller directs a script he co-wrote, and the filmmakers in the movie are in on the joke and the actors on screen crack a lot of jokes while winking at the audience. Case in point – the four “trailers” that are shown before the movie, highlighting the four main characters. The movie and its characters know they are making fun of themselves and they do a good job of it.

Regarding the “R-word,” controversy – when Stiller and Downey’s characters talk about actors taking the roles of retarded characters to win Oscars, it’s a cheap shot at the actors not people with disabilities. If you don’t have a thick skin, go see a Disney movie.

Even without the LOL moments, I liked “Tropic” and thought the movie never felt stale or bland.

On a personal note, I was glad to see Jay Baruchel, who is part of Judd Apatow’s comic stable, finally get some screen time. I was a huge fan of the short-lived “Undeclared,” and I really think Baruchel can hold his own against the likes of Seth Rogan.

Grade B

Forged in China

I was really looking forward to this year's Summer Olympics. So much in fact that I tivoed the opening ceremonies and much of the sporting competitions (but not table tennis - that's not a sport).
On Friday night, after turning downs offers to go to Vegas and do body shots off of models, I plopped down and watched the opening ceremonies. And I was blown away. The synchronized drumming - Fou Drum Performance - was awesome (now that should be a sport)! The drums would light up when in use and from an overview, the lights would compose of Chinese symbols and characters and a countdown.

I was especially blown away by what can only be described as the "movable type" portion, where 800 or so Chinese moved blocks up and down, recreating Chinese symbols and the Great Wall . I was convinced that a hydraulic system was moving the blocks.

All of it seemed too real. Apparently it was.
We learned yesterday that the "footstep" fireworks were "digitally altered" for television.

Then today, we learn the Chinese government pulled a C+C Music Factory, and had a cute little Chinese girl lip-sync the national anthem, because apparently, the real singer was just a fat-out uggo. According to the Washington Post:In an interview with Beijing Radio, Chen Qigang, a member of China's Politburo, said that organizers concluded during a rehearsal that the voice of 9-year-old Lin Miaoke, who appeared before a television audience of tens of millions, "must change." Yang Peiyi, the 7-year-old girl whose voice was judged superior, would actually sing the song.
"We combined the perfect voice and the perfect performance," Chen said. He added that, "The audience will understand that it's in the national interest."

Thanks to the government of China for reconfirming what a dickhead you are to your people. And thanks for allowing us to distrust everything you say and do.

Remember that stabbing death of an former U.S. Olympian? Well, according the "official Xinhua News Agency," shortly after the attack, the assailant, Tang Yongming, 47, leapt to his death from a balcony on the Drum Tower, five miles from the main Olympics site. Is anyone buying this? Sorry China, sounds too much like the book 1984. I wouldn't expect you to get the reference since that book is probably banned in the country.

These kinds of actions is only to draw more suspicion to the actions of this obvious deceitful government. I mean, it's not like we have much to say in that category.

I can't help but think what the Chinese government will do next to make sure the world see it's flawlessness. Last night, I was watching the men's team gymnastics competition, I mean between looking at hardcore straight porn and drinking Bud, a man's beer. The Chinese team was freakin' amazing. Their flips were better, higher and all around more flipper than anyone else. Maybe they were that good. Or maybe in the interest of country morale, the performances were altered.

No, I haven't jumped on the Obama wagon . . . yet. Just liked seeing this guy in front of the state flag.

'Dark Knight' - Believe the hype

I have some bad news.

The business of making movies just got a lot harder.

I saw a midnight showing of “The Dark Knight” and no the movie does not come close to all the hype. It surpasses all of it. Completely.

My hat is off to any filmmaker that even attempts to try to top TDK.

The more I think about this movie, the more I am convinced I just saw one of the greatest movies of all time. Maybe time will tell or maybe I am just coming off of only two hours of sleep.

Calling “The Dark Knight” a superhero movie is underselling what this film actually is. It’s more appropriate to place this movie with the great crime epics such as “The Departed” and “The Godfather.”

While I was enjoyed the first film, “Batman Begins,” it didn’t leave too much of an impression on me. I saw it in the theater on opening weekend but never had the urge to see it again. But with “The Dark Knight,” I have feeling this one is going to stick with me for some time.

It’s difficult to extract a movie of this magnitude and dissect into parts or scenes. Yes the script was brilliant. It rivals anything that comes to mind. The directing was nearly flawless. Director Christopher Nolan was able to capture panic and mayhem during fight scenes with SWAT cars, 18-wheelers and the ultra cool bat-cyle one minute then bring the movie back to cerebral level where our heroes battled against their own morals and conflictions. The score was frighteningly on cue, drawing panic as we watched the Joke become an “agent of chaos," bringing down Gothom Ciy and its white and black knights.

And the acting. Oh the acting!

I am completely astonished by Heath Ledger’s portrayal of Joker. I was pretty unhappy when I learned that the Joker was going to be the villain in this movie, only because I loved Tim Burton’s 1989 Batman and Jack Nicholson’s portrayal of Batman’s nemesis but what Heath Ledger did with this role was nothing short of outstanding and complete. Hannibal Lecter now as company as being considered one of greatest film villains of all time. It’s good that Ledger didn’t take up anymore screen time than he already did because he would have upstaged the title character. A long-running complaint I have had about superhero movies is the lack of super villains. The Green Goblin? Please. Even the bad guys in “Batman Begins” and “Ironman” were rather forgettable. But with “The Dark Knight” my complaint is now silent.

But Ledger’s portrayal was hardly the only standout performance in the movie. Christian Bale as Batman was strong and will probably go down as the best caped crusader ever. And in any other movie, Aaron Eckhart’s performance as District Attorney Harvey Dent would have been second to none! God, this guy is good. Maggie Gyllenhaal as the love interest of both Batman and Dent, was an upgrade from Katie Holmes. But as good as Ledger was for going over the top as Joker, Gary Oldman achieved the same greatness by playing Commissioner James Gordon with so much humility.

Put all these elements together and you have a film that is truly worthy of be praised as a grand epic.

From the opening bank heist scene, the film never lets go of its audience’s attention. I couldn’t believe a film could carry on like that for two and half hours.

No movie is absent of missteps or blunders, “The Dark Knight” included, but it’s not even worth the time or cyberspace to discuss the mostly insignificant shortcomings of this movie, only because this movie supercedes almost everywhere else.

My only complaint is not really a complaint but more of a concern. “The Dark Knight” is horribly dark, sinister and violent. Way too much for a film rated PG-13. I’m really disturb that any movie studio would even try to market this film to children, via toys, product ties or marketing. Yes, you don’t see any blood or gore but people are shot on camera and the themes in this movie rival those seen in “Silence of the Lambs.” Parents should be very cautious in taking children younger than 13.


Grade: A

The case for the midnight movies

It was the first day after I had finished high school.
I was done with high school forever and instead of finding myself partying it up or starting some lame summer job, I found myself waiting inline for tickets for the first “Star Wars” prequel.
Remember, this was before buying movie tickets online became the norm ­ in fact, I’m not even sure you could buy movie tickets online before the millennium (I graduated high school in 1999). Nope, you had to buy your tickets old school ­ at the box office.
So there I was, in line with Star War nerds waiting for “The Phantom Menace.” I¹m particularly not a huge “Star Wars” fan but my best high school friend was, so I guess I was by proxy.
The line literally snaked all the way around the theater. We lined up around maybe 5 or 6 a.m. to wait for the box office to open at noon. We had thought about camping overnight but decided to leave that up to the hardcore nerds.
We played “Star Wars” trivia to kill the time. We brought our toy lightsabers for impromptu intergalactic battles. We got sunburned.

When the box office opened, we slowed made our way to the front, paid for our tickets for the midnight showing and we were set . . . only to come back in a week and wait even longer for seats.
Nowadays, you buy your movie tickets in advance, sometimes up to a week, print them at home and then show up 20 minutes before the movie starts. No fuss, no mess.
Tonight, I'm driving to Denver to watch “The Dark Knight" at midnight. I had hoped to see the movie on the state's only IMAX screen but when our group went to buy our tickets last week, the theater was already sold out.
I guess on the surface, seeing a movie at midnight doesn't make much sense. It’s going to be the same exact movie when it plays at the same theater on Sunday at 3 p.m. So why bother?
I guess I make the pilgrimage to midnight movies to make an event out of seeing a movie on the big screen. I wrote earlier that as of late, I have been going to midnight showings more out of habit that in anticipation of movies but for the most part it's still worthwhile.
I remember in college, driving to either Boulder or Denver to go see the three “Lord of the Rings” movies at midnight showings. The movies all came out either the week before or during finals, which made going to them and passing class a challenge but still worth it.
There is just something about seeing a movie with a roomful of people eagerly awaiting what is about to appear before them. I remember during the “The Phantom Menace,” when the Lucasfilm logo came up and people cheering and rooting from their seats. I found myself cheering. It made going to the movies an actual experience. Sometimes going to see a movie shouldn't be so casual.

But the midnight venture must be reserved for big popcorn movies. “Shawshank Redemption,” “No Country for Old Men” were great movies but just don’t warrant a midnight venture. If you are having a hard time determining what movies you should see at midnight, ask yourself how likely it would be to see a grown man dressed as an elf, wizard, pirate or superhero. Luckily, my movie troupe stops short of dressing up for movie premieres.

Then when the movies end (and I mean after the final credits -­ movie nerds ALWAYS stay past the credits to see if there is a final scene left for the devoted fans -­ it's our equivalent of an encore), you walk out opening sharing your opinion of the movie with friends and the complete stranger you sit next to. Or sharing your frustration with everyone about George Lucas’ audacity of CGI-ing Yoda.
And I don't think the people that go see midnight movies are going for bragging rights to say they saw it before anyone else. If that were true, they would either have to be a theater owner, movie executive or the very least, move to the East Coast where midnight comes first. Sure some see it at midnight so they can rush home after and post leaks online and bicker over minuscule details on postings but I'm sure that group doesn't represent the vast of us midnighters.
I have the highest hopes for “The Dark Knight.” I have for the most part stayed in the dark as reviews have started to roll out but the tidbits I have seen have left me with the impression that this movie is going to be freakin’ awesome.
And yeah, I might be a little grumpy come Friday (I don't expect to be back from Denver anytime before 4 a.m.) but it's totally worth it.

Of course America doesn't get it

Satire is in the eyes of those who get it.

I am not going to say I'm a regular New Yorker reader. I get junk mail asking me to subscribe but I just can't justify adding yet another magazine to my bathroom reading list.

But I read it enough to know where it's coming from. It's on the tabletops of my more affluent and well-read friends. I know it serves a small, niche demographic. It serves an small, educated and elitist (gasp) group of readers.

For the most part, the contents of The New Yorker are overlooked by the vast mass who are content with their gossip rags and just-on-the-surface news, which at times includes me.

So it doesn't surprise me at all that a lot of people are having a knee-jerk reaction to this week's cover.

Instead of attacking Obama and his wife, the cover and article attack their critics who portray the Obamas as anti-American Muslim fundamentalists.

Satire does come with its pitfalls. If people don't see the joke, they take the comment at face value. Though many are quick to condemn the cover, I wonder how many even know the the title of the accompanying article (“The Politics of Fear”)?

People who just look at the cover without looking inside to read the context of the drawing are simply morons. For the people who think assume Obama is a Muslim and if this cover confirms those misguided views, then I'm sorry but they are ignorant idiots and no argument from the other side will change that.

The only mistake The New Yorker made was being too witty for its own good and thinking more than its core readers would understand satire.

Is it Thursday yet?? Highly awaiting for 'Dark Knight'

One week and counting.

Come next Friday, I will be coming off less than four hours of sleep after coming back from seeing "The Dark Knight" in Denver at a midnight showing at the Imax theater. Man, it feels good to be excited over a movie.

As I prepare for my midnight pilgrimage to see “Dark Knight,” I’m trying to think back on the last time I was excited to see a film at midnight.

As I have gotten older, I have learned it takes more and more to excite me when it comes to movies. I remember as a kid, seeing a trailer for a blockbuster movie and losing patience as I waited for it to come to my theater. Because I lived in a small town in New Mexico, we didn't get our movies on opening day. We had to wait as the movie made a rotation among local theaters, which meant we waited for as long as two months for a movie to come to our town after it opened.

I could remember being excited for every movie that was made, packaged, marketed and sold to young kids (and some adult fare such as “Terminator 2” – which was actually marketed to kids with toys and even trading cards). And I don't remember being disappointed often. And this was a period where I would check the movie listings every week to see if "Mario Bros." was finally playing at my theater. Yeah, really “Mario Bros.”

I don't know if it's age or experience that has made me more critical of movies. Now in my late 20s, it takes a lot to make me excited about seeing a movie at midnight. Before the newest Batman movie, the only movie I was really anticipating to see was "Indiana Jones" and I anticipated that movie with a ton of hesitation (which I was right to). It seems lately I have been seeing midnight showings more out of habit than anticipation (see “Cloverfield” “Ironman” and Hancock”).

I think it’s being burned too often by highly-anticipated movies that has lead to my jadedness. Just off the top of my head – the “Matrix” sequels, “Indiana Jones,” the “Star Wars” prequels, and “Superman.”

I walked out of these movies discouraged and disappointed (especially “Indiana Jones,” which killed a part of my childhood).

The “Lord of the Rings” trilogy titillated my movie palate. So did the first “Matrix.” But those tasty delights have been too few in between.

Now, I have become reserved when I salivate over upcoming movies and I have no reason to believe “The Dark Knight” will disappoint.

When it comes to movies that I countdown to open, I try to put my head in the sand when it comes to reviews, teasers, online leaks and spoilers. I’ve done this with “Dark Knight” but with me being plugged into a computer screen for most of the work day, coming across tidbits of information is unavoidable. From what I have gathered from the first few words of early reviews of this movie, it is going to redeem my passion for big, spectacular popcorn movies.

If you are planning to see “The Dark Knight” at midnight, I would advise getting advance tickets early. A New York Times article talked about some movie theaters choosing to have 3 a.m. and even 6 a.m. showings of “Dark Knight” because their midnight showings have been sold out. And because large portions of this movie were filmed in Imax, I would definitely suggest seeing this movie in the larger format.

Variety rips off my Hancock review (I wish)

Wow, I just read the Variety review of Hancock, and surprisingly it echoed a lot of my sentiments (or mine echos theirs).

Variety: What the writers and director Peter Berg do with the concept in the end, however, is nowhere near sufficiently thought out, and narrative illogic and missed opportunities plague the film increasingly as it cartwheels through its surprisingly brief running time.

Me: (Smith) saves Jason Bateman’s character, a public relations guru who takes up the task of improving Hancock’s image. Then the movie takes a twist, leading those in the theater seats on an unusual and awkward route. The result is an uneven flick that makes me think that its stars and director were uncomfortable with the unorthodox script. . . . . . With a running time of 92 minutes, the pace of the movie felt rushed.

Variety: (Hancock) . . . treads the very edge of PG-13 permissiveness and will no doubt catch many July 4 weekend kid-herding parents unhappily unaware.

Me: But “Hancock” is definitely not a family pic. It’s filled with a particular “a word” and graphic scenes of gunplay. I particularly don’t mind the curse words and violence but I’m sure a lot of families will.